Waking up
This year last time, I was on 24 death watch. I watched a strong, amazing woman, the mother of my children, wither to a skeleton with skin. January 2nd will be one year since her death. Maybe that's why I've been a bit crazy huh?
posted by Jeff Kelley at 10:21 PM
5 Comments:
So that's who you're talking about. What did she die from?
Well I'm talking about 2 things, but my wife died of cancer after 2 years of up and down. We were separated at the time she was diagnosed. I moved back in after the 1st year, and spent the second year with her.
I completely lost all control for a while there, I mean literally unable to direct my thoughts or feelings. It's been building for a while, but it really hit on Thanksgiving. I was totally focused on something else, but I'm beginning to realize how much of my state had to do with Peggy.
Sorry to hear that. What kind of cancer was it?
I'm in a similar position, well...potentially. My wife was diagnosed a couple years ago with non- hodgkins lymphoma which, as you may or may not know, is treatable but not curable. She went through the second round of chemo this last summer but the doctor said he's running out of options and felt the only real choice is a bone marrow transplant. Supposedly, if it comes back so fast, as it did with her in a year, the next time it comes back even quicker.
We're in the process of doing donor testing right now, which shouldn't be too much of a problem, the doctor at UCSF feels, cause she's got twelve brothers and sisters. Statistically, she has a one in five chance of not surviving the transplant.
This is a financial and fiscal nightmare. She has to stay at UCSF for one month. Then, she has to live within forty minutes of USCF for three months, going to the hospital three times a week. Then, after she comes home, assuming all goes well, we have to go to UCSF once a week for six months. The costs and major life disruption of this whole thing is almost more than I can handle, not to mention the possible end results.
Wow Fred, that's huge. The disease tears your life apart, and there's no garuntee that the cost and separation and displacement will work. I wish for the best for you and your wife. Good to have family, huh? Good to have hope. How is it effecting her day to day quality of life? Can you still share goodness? I hope so.
She is fine now, which is what really sucks. She has a full head of hair and goes to work each day. I told her, after we came back home after the last trip to SF, "I like the way things are now...". She went thru chemo fairly well. If we could just do that now, for the next umpteen years, I'd be happy with that, although that would suck for her.
The fact that she has a large family is good, although some folks have commented, or so it seems to me, about that large family- not PC. I can't help but wonder what would happen to someone in the same situation that didn't have such a large family to draw support from?
Oh well. We'll deal with the next step(s).
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